Buck Brennan’s Big Book of Bad Decisions is the vivid, heartbreaking, and harrowing true story of what life is life as an asshole. Some critics are calling it the most important book since the Bible. It is the kind of book that will change your life forever. If you don’t believe me, my third cousin from Jersey didn’t read it, and he’s still on heroin. My neighbor didn’t read it either, and he is still really fat. My nan and pap didn’t read it. Now they are both dead.
Buck Brennan spent his whole life living a lie, the same way gay people do before they realize they are gay. He tried to fit in and do things he thought normal people do like have manners, chew with their mouth closed, and not pee all over the toilet seat, but it never felt natural to Buck. Deep down inside he had this burning desire to talk during movies, wipe boogies on the couch, put empty milk cartons back in the fridge, and squeeze the toothpaste from the top. Even as small a child, Buck would find himself staring off into the distance in parking lots, longing for the day when he could someday drive his own car so he could take up two spaces. Buck spent his whole life struggling with being an asshole. This is his story.
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