Humor Fiction – Back To Sovietsky

Back To SovietskyBack To Sovietsky
By Michael and Danny D’Agostino
Published: January 2017
ISBN: 978-1542660761
ASIN: B01N4PZMX4
Genre: Humor Fiction
Formats Available For Review: Print (Limited Quantities, Only Available to Qualified Reviewers/Bloggers in the U.S.), pdf and epub

“Bring us your tired, your poor, your huddled masses, yearning to be free,” but don’t bring us Vladimir Ruska! But that’s just what happened. Yes, Vladimir Ruska, the Russian shiftless corner cutter, came to America to achieve success. But he couldn’t even keep his janitor’s job. In less than a year, he got kicked out of the U.S for violating his visa, and for piling up thousands of dollars in unpaid traffic tickets.

But that is just the start of the saga of Vladimir Ruska. He may be lazy, but he is not stupid. So, he returned to his small, impoverished town in rural Russia, and led his relatives on a journey to a brilliant, new enterprise. They started an unbelievably successful ripoff of McDonald’s, called McRuskies. It worked. It allowed Vladimir the opportunity to move back to America, and this time, with a whole new, positive attitude. Yes! He ultimately became a successful model Russian immigrant in the USA. And four years later, Vladimir and his entire family emigrated to the U.S. Maybe they don’t speak perfect English, but they have the determination to make it in America. They end up starting “Babushka’s Chop House” in Brighton Beach, New York. The story features all the flavor and fun of ethnic Russians attempting to speak the English language. Here’s an example, when Vladimir returns home to Gorzichistan:

VLADIMIR: “Oh yes, cameras everywhere in USA. You go to bank. They watch you. You go to store, they watch you. You buy gas for car, they watch you. You dump ol’ paint in river, they watch you . . . and put you in jail!”
BORIS: “Who watching you?”
VLADIMIR: “The ‘E’ ‘P’ ‘P’ ‘A’.”
YURI: “Oh yeah, we hear dat on news. You go to da outhouse and who is watching you?”
STASIK: “The ‘E’ ‘P’ ‘P’ ‘A’.”
BABUSHKA: “So we got KGB, FSB. And America got ‘E’ ‘P’ ‘P’ ‘A’. Everyting same wherever you go. No different. Right Grandpa?”
Grandpa, who worked in the Russian coal mines all his life, takes a deep breath and heaves up a resounding, gurgling persistent cough.”
GRANDPA: “Eeeh! Ahhhh! Ehhhgheghhheeee!
BABUSHKA: “. . . See? . . . He say yes!”

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Humorous Sci-fi Adventure – NASA’s 1st Mission to Mars – For What?!!!

NASA's 1st Mission to Mars - For WhatNASA’s 1st Mission to Mars – For What?!!!
By Michael and Danny D’Agostino
Published: July 2017
ISBN: 978-1548482374
Genre: Humor, Sci-Fi Adventure
Formats Available For Review: Print (limited quantities, only available to qualified reviewers/bloggers in the U.S.)

Chicago Scientists Rebuke NASA’s Manned Mission to Mars in their New Comedy Sci-Fi Novel, “NASA’s 1st Mission to Mars – For What?!!!”

The issue: Why spend billions of taxpayer dollars on a manned mission to Mars, a totally dead, uninhabitable planet? For what?!

This witty, sometimes off-the-wall comedy, tells it like it is with authentic, real science, because it’s written by two former scientists, emerging as the comedy writing team of Michael and Danny D’Agostino. You can confirm what they say, like living on Mars would be near impossible: due to its oxygen-poor atmosphere, lack of Earth-like organic soil, the presence of elements and compounds in the rock surface that would contaminate plant growth.

The radiation alone would kill anyone walking on the surface without a thick, all-body radiation barrier. No trees, no plant or animal life, no water, except at the polar regions where you would freeze to death – what is the justification for massive expenditures to finance a mission to a dead planet? There is none.

THE STORY:
Penniless, flat broke, sleeping in a cardboard box in a tent city on the South Side of Chicago, this formerly undistinguished man, Stanley Marczek, becomes the first man to walk on Mars. How is it possible? Why would NASA select a civilian, non-career astronaut for the mission? Obviously, living in a confined space for nineteen months for the journey to Mars, is one consideration. Another, his screening test results prove to be exceptional, better than all other candidates. And this is a man of grit and incredible courage. He accepts NASA’s offer, seeing it as an opportunity to remake his life, earn a cool three million bucks, and return to Earth a hero. But the story isn’t just about Stanley Marczek, (aka Joksey), and the mission to Mars. It is also about his relationships with his loyal friends: Gnidek, a Viet Nam veteran, his dog Chichi, his girlfriend Hannah, and all his friends at tent city. His journey is clouded with almost insurmountable personal and technical challenges, and it is his friends who provide invaluable moral support; they are all in it together. But what is the catch? There has to be a catch. The catch is that Joksey is a man of strong will who freely expresses his mind. So when the mission is complete, and Stanley Marczek returns to Earth, he publicly questions the wisdom of all manned missions to Mars, to the embarrassment of NASA. And he does not mince words. He tells it like it is, straight out! This novel features realistic science-fiction. Although it is a comedy at heart, it makes a very poignant argument about manned missions to Mars.

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Literary Fiction/Humor – Cities of the Common Man

Cities of the Common ManCities of the Common Man
By Ben Hasskamp
Published: June 2017
ASIN: B071JZMZJ5
Pages: 452
Genre: Literary Fiction – Humor
Formats Available For Review: kindle, pdf

The week before his 30th birthday, once-renowned New York chef Billy MacPherson learns his restaurant is bankrupt, he’s been evicted from his apartment, and his estranged father has dropped dead. Against his better judgment, Billy agrees to return to Oregon to face the family and friends he callously left behind.

During the reading of his father’s will, Billy’s extended family is left hundreds of thousands of dollars in estate money, while Billy’s only bequeathment is his father’s beloved 1985 Back To The Future-replica DeLorean. With no restaurant, no money, no prospects, and only a DeLorean to his name, Billy sets off on a journey down the Pacific coast meeting up with distant friends from college, ancient rivals from culinary school, and old flames who still flicker in his heart. All while fighting the terrible—yet, inevitable—prospect of turning 30.

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Ben Hasskamp
Email: benhasskamp (at) gmail.com
Website: http://www.pecorinoandeggs.com

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Fantasy/Satire – Falstaff’s Big Gamble

Falstaff's Big GambleFalstaff’s Big Gamble
By Hank Quense
Publisher: Strange Worlds Publishing
ISBN: 978-1478116196
ASIN: B008W87OJW
Genre: Fantasy, Satire
Formats Available For Review: epub, mobi, pdf

This fantasy adventure is Shakespeare’s Worst Nightmare.

It takes two of the Bard’s most famous plays and recasts them with fantasy characters.

You don’t have to know anything about Shakespeare to enjoy this fantasy comedy. Hamlet is now a dwarf, Othello is a dark elf and Falstaff is a human. If that isn’t bad enough, these two tragedies are now comedies with Falstaff, Shakespeare’s most popular rogue, thrown in as a bonus. Both Hamlet and Othello are plagued by the scheming Falstaff, a human.

Hamlet is the Prince of Denmarko and is striving to start a private business — bee-keeping — to demonstrate his competence and independence from the court. He is shocked to learn, from a ghost, that his uncle Clodio murdered his father. Indecisive, he tries to balance his love of bees with his mother’s demands to help Clodio and the ghost’s insistence that he avenge his father’s murder.

Othello, using a tarted-up resume, is named to the post of Minister of Homeland Security in the city of Dun Hythe. Once he assumes the post he realizes his responsibilities are much greater than he imagined they would be. He soon discovers his appointment was engineered by his wife’s grandmother who heads the local crime syndicate and demands that Othello illegally award her the contracts to rebuild the Dun Hythe’s walls.

Falstaff is a life-long schemer and scam artist. He calls himself Sir John Falstaff since he won the title ‘Sir’ in a card game with the knight. A deserter from the army, he travels around the country with his batman, Poulet, searching for opportunities. During the story Falstaff sees Hamlet and Othello as easy marks and gulls both of them.

Falstaff, claiming he and Othello once fought in the same battle, accepts money from Othello to recruit a force to put down the piracy that plagues Dun Hythe’s port. Instead, he steals two ships and goes into the piracy business on his own.
Later on, Falstaff decides to give up piracy as it is getting too dangerous. He saves Hamlet’s life after Clodio tries to assassinate the prince. Falstaff helps Hamlet avenge his father’s murder, then accumulates vast power by persuading Hamlet, now king, to let him take over the burden of ruling. Falstaff convinces Hamlet that Dun Hythe and Othello will invade Denmarko shortly and their only hope is to attack first. Falstaff recruits an army and leads it , along with Hamlet, to attack Dun Hythe where Falstaff plans to make himself king over the richest city in Gundarland.

Othello, incapable of leading the defense of Dun Hythe, turns over the responsibility to his subordinates and they prepare the city for an attack. Falstaff’s arrives and, expecting to attack an undefended city, sees the now formidable defenses. His army falls apart without striking a blow and Falstaff scampers off to seek new prospects. Hamlet and Othello agree to end the attack and declare peace.

In the end, Hamlet becomes comfortable with ruling Denmarko, Othello is considered a hero and a success for the first time in his life and Falstaff continues a life of running scams.

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Hank Quense
Email: hankquense@icloud.com
Website: http://www.strangeworldspublishing.com/wp
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/hank.quense
Twitter: https://twitter.com/hanque99

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Humor – Trailer Trash, With a Girl’s Name

trailer-trash-with-a-girls-nameTrailer Trash, With a Girl’s Name
By Stacey Roberts
Publisher: Sons of Joy
ISBN: 978-0615933887
ASIN: B00IX0MIAO
Genre: Humor
Formats Available For Review: Print (limtied quantities, only available for qualified reviewers/bloggers in the U.S.), PDF, Mobi, Kindle

When the author was born, his mother did the unthinkable. She gave him a girl’s name—Stacey. But Stacey’s name was just the first hurdle he’d face in his uphill climb from birth to manhood. He also had to deal with an entitled older brother, the hodgepodge of different men his mother was involved with, and the nomadic lifestyle he was forced to endure for five years. And to top it all off, his mother couldn’t cook a decent meal to save her life. Trailer Trash, With a Girl’s Name is Stacey Roberts’ lighthearted, often hilarious account of growing up in an unstable household during the 1980s. Full of humor, history, and hope, it follows Stacey from the hospital room where he was born to the Winnebago that carried him across the country, filling in the gaps with a wit and humor that anyone with a dysfunctional family can appreciate. So go ahead and start reading. Once you hop aboard the Winnebago with Stacey and his quirky family, you’ll find that you’re in for the ride or your life, where what you learn along the way is not only entertaining, but also enormously enriching.

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Romance, Humor, Women’s Fiction – Matched In Heaven

Matched In HeavenMatched In Heaven
By Angela Page
Publisher: Caliburn Press
Published: October 2015
ISBN: 978-1629293295
ASIN: B0161XSE9I
Genre: Romance, Humor, Romantic Comedy
Formats Available For Review: pdf, epub, mobi

Jake and Mimi are dead and riddled with guilt. They both left their spouses, Samantha and Sydney, back on Earth with young children and many complications.

Now in Heaven, Jake and Mimi join a support group that includes a celestial matchmaking service for their partners on Earth. They quarrel while negotiating a May/December romance for their spouses. A match is made in Heaven with the help of the support group leader, Marcel, a former disgraced priest, and Carmella, a new arrival and former psychic.

The Earthly couple embarks on a passionate, whirlwind romance with dramatic consequences. But when the match looks doomed both Marcel and Jake are in competition to become Samantha’s’ next Earthly suitors. They plead their case with the spiritual authorities to be reincarnated. Who will win and how do they deal with a third suitor?
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